The Skidwork

The time has come.  30 short, anxious minutes until the defining moment of the 2009 Redskins season.  If they defer the kick, all hell is breaking loose.  Will the great experiment prevail.  Only 48 minutes of football will decide.  See you on the other side.

Jim Zorn’s seat could not be hotter.  With the recent announcement that he has been stripped of his play calling responsibilities it is apparent that his time in the District is on the verge of temination.  But the problems with the Redskins run deeper and broader than the Potomac, and don’t expect Sherm Lewis to sail across to the rescue.

How did it come to this? 

With what began as a ill advised – does Dan Snyder do anything that is advised, does he have advisers? – promotion of the wet behind the headphones Zorn to head coach has now become a soap opera reminiscent of the squabbling and inefficiency we are used to from our government.  When anything gets compared to the bureaucracy of the US, you know you are in trouble.  Last year the Skins came out gangbusters with a 6-2 record through the first half of the season, including wins at Dallas and Philly, before flipping the script in the second half and going 2-6 while missing the playoffs.  This year’s 2-4 record includes losses to Detroit and Carolina and a home loss to the lowly Kansas City Chiefs, which may have been the last straw for an already seething fan base that has seen their home team tank faster and harder than a Republican version of TARP in the House. 

The debacle against the Chiefs is what really sent upper management into blind damage control, pressuring Zorn into abandoning his starting QB and then punishing him like a sixth grader with a bad report card.  Only instead of taking away his TV privileges for a week, they deliberately embarrassed a grown man and head coach by telling him he couldn’t call the plays.  As if play calling is the problem and not the lack of ability on a neglected offensive line, the most important part of a football team that has not been upgraded since 1992.  Evidence of this is perennial workhorse back Clinton Portis only have one 100 yard rushing game this season and only because he ripped off a 78-yard run against KC. 

The bottom line is there is no accountability in the front office.  Snyder and  Vinny Cerrato, executive vice president of football operations and yes man, refuse to take responsibility for their poor strategies and execution.  It is obvious that their emulation of the Yankees – tossing money at aging free agents, neglecting the essential dynamics of a team, and the hubris to think they can make it work – is not conducive to building a winning franchise on the football field.  But they are more than willing to throw whoever is calling the plays under the bus.  Enter Sherm Lewis.

Hired as an offensive consultant on Oct. 2, Snyderatto did not even tell Zorn he was on staff until he arrived at practice with a clipboard and Redskins issued sweats.  Now he will be the main offensive coaching force in next week’s Monday Night Football match-up against the Eagles.  This is equivalent to hiring the winner of your neighborhood Madden ’10 tournament and asking him to lead your team to the playoffs.  Think about it.  When you play a video game you have no idea who is on the field except for the names of guys on your fantasy roster, you don’t actually have to coach anybody, you are watching the game from an elevated position, and all you have to do is call the plays.  Lewis doesn’t even get to do the best part; control the players.  This is guy that was at the top of his game when he retired…5 years ago. 

This could go one of two ways.  Lewis pulls off the miracle and the Skins turn the season around.  More likely, the Skins look like the Little Giants – from the first half of the movie, not the Annexation of Puerto Rico part of the movie – and lose by the biggest margin in NFL history.  Either way I wouldn’t be surprised if, 5 years from now, Zorn turns up as a cross dressing police chief screaming “The laces were out!” and trying to kidnap Dan Marino.  This is the world we live in. 

The real victim in this whole scenario is Zorn himself, who has remained boiling under the surface but dignified during his ego pummelling at the hands of two snivelling weasels.  The players back him, the fans are smart enough to know it is not entirely hs fault, but he keeps having to take the blame.  He will go down with the ship, the only question is will he survive the bye week.  With the abuse he has taken it is a testament to his character he has not resigned.  The Redskins’ front office is like the weak kneed guy who doesn’t want to break up with his girlfriend but does all the things he knows will make her break up with him.  It starts from the top down and will not change until there is a strong GM and a hands off owner.

Word on the college basketball street is that Derrick Rose — currently of the Chicago Bulls, formerly of the University of Memphis Tigers — was not eligable for his freshman season because of an “invalidated standardized test score” in high school.  Memphis made it to the NCAA Finals that season, riding Rose’s coattails, and he subsequently became the #1 pick in the NBA draft.  Some may look at this as just another college sports scandal involving a high profile player and a high profile coach (John Calipari, who has left the program for the greener, bluegrass pastures of Kentucky).  But this highlights a fundamental flaw in the much criticized NCAA and NBA.

When NBA Commissioner David Stern instigated the rule that you had to be a certain age to enter the NBA Draft, he was following in the footsteps of the NFL, which has a similar rule.  But this was a flawed decision.  The NFL rule stemmed from the fact that football is a much more physical game than basketball and for kids coming out before they were ready there were serious consequences for not being physically up-to-snuff.  Stern made the decision following some high-profile, straight out of high school players washing out of the league and washing up on the Jersey Shore.  OK, that last bit was a little exaggerated, but you get the idea.  He was attempting to protect these immature high school athletes from getting too much, too soon and not being able to handle it.  It was a decision based on the mentality, not physicality, of a high schooler.

The world of basketball in America has always been notoriously corrupt and shady, from the top down.  From fixed drafts and playoff games, to booster sponsored college programs, to ABCD and Nike summer camps, to street agents latching onto preteens in the ghetto.   It permeates all levels of the game, NBA to YMCA, and this is just another example of the nature of cheating that surrounds basketball.  The rule that Stern implemented had more of an impact on the college game than the pro.  In fact, it changed the landscape of college basketball forever.  Used to be, a high school phenom skipped college and entered the draft — see King James, Kevin Garnett, The Black Mamba, etc.  But now, because they have to be one year removed from high school to enter, they need a place to play/kill time before they cash in.  This is where college basketball comes in, and coaches like John Calipari have taken full advantage.

Players like Rose, Kevin Durant, and Micheal Beasley have no incentive to attend college other than this rule.  They put in their year, dominate like men among boys, then bolt for the draft.  This puts the pressure on college coaches to determine if it is worth recruiting a player that will only be there for one year, and has explicitly said so.  Some, like Calipari, embrace/exploit these one-hit-wonders with much success, while others do not.

This rule has had other major repercussions also.   A player like Rose, and this recent revelation of his invalidated SAT/ACT is at the heart of the matter.  Stern has encouraged this type of overt cheating with the draft age limit.  The only motivation that a kid has for even taking the SAT/ACT now is so he can play hoops for a year before he’s eligible.  This means he has added pressure to perform well and get into school and will do what it takes to get there, using the resources — I’m not talking Kaplan here — available, which are numerous.  This results in the situation we have with Rose and Memphis.  The big losers are the Universities who get duped into taking these kids then get burned when they get caught cheating.  The other losers are the hoops players who actually want to go to college, but have their scholarships gobbled up by players just skating through so they can have an NBA career.  That is the real travesty.

The flip side of the coin is: why should these amazing athletes be forced to spend a year dunking on college kids when they should be passing to a superstar?  The situation is becoming more absurd with the realization that these high school stars can spend a year playing pro ball in Europe and then return to the NBA, skipping college game altogether.  They do not even need to graduate high school, but can skip their senior, or even junior year to play overseas for a couple seasons AND get payed.

Is there anything harder than the business?

Manny Ramirez has been the beacon of hope for the sports enthusiast who constantly believes that sports figures take themselves too seriously.  Each instance of “Manny being Manny” would make us feel as though there were still professional athletes out there that enjoyed playing the game their natural ability allowed them.  It was a refreshing step back from the expectations, price tags, and talk radio criticism that permeates the pro sports zeitgeist.  His attitude was not antagonistic, but youthful and based on a transparent view of Major League Baseball that allowed him to see through the hype and enjoy himself doing what most people only dream of.  He was anti-Barry Bonds, the anti-Alex Rodriguez, the anti-Brady Anderson: a man whose narcissism (you cannot be a pro athlete without a slightly larger than normal ego) was not at the forefront of his personality and was not the driving force of his career.  Was this all an elaborate hoax?

The revelation that Manny being Manny also means Manny being Juicy is not just a blow to the MLB and the LA Dodgers; it is a blow to every sports fan that bought into his attitude.  I died a little inside when I heard the news because Manny represented what was good in sport.  With all the scowling and head smacking and media spotlight he was able to keep it fun and pure.  His antics were those of a player enjoying his moment and conscious of the the fact that baseball was still a game, albeit a man’s game with a lot of money on the line.  This is why people loved him, but also why people despised him.

Those thoughts, however, were eroded when we learned Manny had been suspended for 50 games for testing positive for Performance Enhancing Drugs.  He was not different.  He had succumb to the pressures of the game, just like the rest of our national pastime’s fallen heroes.  Manny was the city on a hill during the trials and disappointment of the Juiced Era, a star who seemed to enjoy himself too much to get wrapped up in something so self-absorbed as steroids and the like.

True, nowadays there is nothing shocking about hearing a pro ball player caught cheating, but this case is slightly surprising due to the perceived public and professional image of Manny.  “Manny being Manny” has become synonymous with anyone doing what they want to do despite the circumstances.  “Fred being Fred” could apply to a CPA unorthodox approach to accounting, or “Lisa being Lisa” to a high exec who plays practical jokes on her co-workers.  It was not just the great numbers and clutch hitting that appealed to us, but his attitude that lured us into his favor.  He was a team player that looked like he was having a good time, the type of player we all imaged we would be if we played professional anything.

Now, the people who supported him (like me) will be let down in the most awful way.  But what about the people that hated him for “not caring enough?” Will these people like him more because he cared enough to enhance his performance?  I cannot imagine that will be the case.  They will probably hate him for the same reasons now as ever; because to hate someone for having too much fun doing what they love is to be a plain old HATER.  It will not effect those people like it effects the rest of us.  They will go on with their daily lives of hating, while we have to deal with the aftermath of the last bastion of pure sports enthusiasm wallows on the bench for 50 games.

It is hard to believe that Manny was faking it, but love of the game and PED are the antithesis of each other.  They are the crutch of players whose sole purpose in life is to be loved and emulated and this has never been Manny’s MO (or so it seemed).  He was the one who rose above it, who let his natural talent speak for itself, who played with passion because he loved playing baseball.

I guess it just goes to show that professional sports and money and America can corrupt even those who seem to be immune to its pressures.  But this might be the last straw for many baseball fans.  I know it is for me.